After Jesus hangs on the Cross and draws his last breath what must his followers have felt? The words above are some of what I felt on Holy saturday. I can’t even begin to imagine what it must have been like for the people who were there with him.

We remembered on Friday when Jesus died with some very powerful and heart-wrentching liturgy.

Holy Saturday for me, and I suspect for many, was a hollow day. A day when finding something to do is very difficult.

I spent a lot time on saturday feeling very uncomfortable with this Hollowness until I found a piece of Text:

There is an Old Christian Tradition
that God sends each person into this
World
with a special message to deliver,
with a special song to sing for others,
with a special act of love to bestow.
No one else can speak my message,
or sing my song,
or offer my act of love.
These are entrusted only to me.

This gave rise to the question, What is my song? What is this space in my heart for?

My song is Love, the love of God that would sacrfice his own son, part of himself in the most horrific of ways in order to open up the opportunity for us to be reconciled with him.

That is my song (though not literally I don’t sing well :oops: )

Today in this Joyful time of Celebration and Ressurection spend some time reflecting on your Song, what it is and where it needs to be sung.

Happy Easter

I have taken part in The watch in the past, usually a very short affair with compline or similar to follow. This time it was three hours.

The interesting thing when talking to a few people this morning was a certain element of Guilt if you didn’t manage to stay for the whole thing. I didn’t I popped out to escort a friend to their accommodation for the evening, the Gentlemanly thing to do. Afterwards I went back and completed until midnight.

People were a little anxious because they may have nodded off, or that they left early or that they left and came back.

When the watch happened the first time the disciples fell asleep and were woken several times. They failed to stay awake and Jesus loved them no less for it, why should we be anything different.

Sometimes in life we fall asleep to Jesus call to us, or we drift off, or we just get to uncomfortable, this is part of being human but Jesus still loves us and it is this love that draws us back.

I think what made last night worse was the fact that when we left we had to do so via the nearest door, known  as the Judgment Door .

Today is Good Friday, may it be a blessed day for you and your loved ones.

Such mixed emotions at this time of year, made worse by the fact that I will be away from Family and Parish at Easter School.

What this will entail is a lot of services at the Cathedral and our Partner Church, a lot of Silence and meditation, lots of Lectures and formation and a whole lotta time with those people I am training with.

This is all necessary as it is a requirement of Ordination Training, but given the journey so far this year since BAP and the 4 years so far of ‘Official’ Discernment it will also be a very good time to reflect on that Journey, to begin to understand what the next year leading up to Deaconing will bring.

This detachment from the comforts of life and from those I love is also symbolic

Jesus, in his ministry, was seperated from the life he had, the place he grew up, the Job he trained for. At easter time we also remember that Jesus was seperated from all those he loved when he died on the Cross.

The seperation I am about to face is nothing in comparison to what Jesus went through, but if I go forth in God’s name then I pray that I will come out of the other side changed. Just as Jesus was changed by his seperation that is my hope for the next week.

That is also my hope for others, this Easter time as you embark on the Journey that Holy Week brings I pray that you will be changed, that you will grow into the person of Christ God calls us all to be.

Have a Blessed Easter

How do we go about explaining this season to Primary Children? It’s not too bad on a class by class basis or even a Keystage at a time. With a whole school assembly with children aged 4-11 years old, quite a challenge.

Having worked in the school as a Teaching Assistant I was aware that the school operate a “Stage” system for behaviour management:

• Stage 1 – Verbal warning
• Stage 2 – Stage card(written warning)
• Stage 3 – Time-out in another class for 5 minutes
• Stage 4 – the rest of the session in another class
• Stage 5 – the rest of the day in another class and a letter home or a phone call to parents

At each stage the children are reminded of behaviour strategies appropriate for that child.

The stage 3 was the one that interested me, the instructions for any child on a stage 3 is to spend 5 minutes in another class, this is to give them time to calm down and to think about what they are doing, why their behaviour is inappropriate, how they can change it, what they want to happen.

For me a part of Lent is this 5 Minutes time out, an opportunity to reflect on what we do, why we do it and what we hope to achieve by it. That is not to say that what we do is necessarily inappropriate. During this time we look towards Easter and the Crucifixion of Jesus, what does this mean in our lives? Does what we do reflect what we believe about Jesus’ sacrifice on the Cross?

This Lent why not pick up an egg timer and give yourself a time-out, give yourself the opportunity to reflect on what you do in your life? Why? and How does it reflect Gods Kingdom here on earth.

Have a blessed Lent

If you fancy a try Choose one artist/band and answer the questions with song titles, try no to repeat any, heres my results…

Pick your Artist  Faithless

Describe yourself:    Giving Myself Away

How do you feel:   Pastoral

If you could go anywhere, where would you go:    North Star

Your favorite form of transportation:   Drifting Away

Your best friend is a:    Sun to Me

You and your best friends are: A Kind Of Peace

If your life was a TV show, what would it be called: Machines are us

What is life to you:   Hope and Glory

Your current relationship: She’s My Baby

What is the best advice you have to give:    Take The Long Way Home”

I would like to die… Feelin’ Good”

Time of day:    Sunday 8PM

My motto:   What about love?

The sacred space I didn’t have time for and yet craved was my own private space, just a time when I could sit and know that God is with me, without any agenda or tasks to complete.  It is this kind of sacred space which to be honest, has a tendancy to get lost in the ever increasing pace of life today. Whilst I ran my own company I assigned tasks to the day ensuring that I gave enough time for each task and making sure I got done what needed to be done. Why then could I not do the same in my spiritual life?

I like many people put a lot of importance on the coorporate worship that I take part in, and rightly so, it forms a large part of my sipiritual life, being with the people in shared acts of worship and devotion builds a sense of fellowship and allows for active prayer. But this public prayer doesn’t really give a lot of space for private reflection and exploration.

My advice to anyone is to make space for personal exploration of your relationship with God, there are many ways to do this, whilst out walking the dog, whilst gardening, listening to music or even just sitting quietly in a space where you can be left to your thoughts for a while. However you do it, making space to listen to God and your own thoughts can be a very rewarding and spiritually recharging time.

My personal favourite is to listen to music, anything that suits my mood, but something that I am familiar with and as I listen to this familiar sound I allow my thoughts to follow their own path and engage with them.

Give it a go. Find space in your own life and make is Sacred, give time to explore and develop youe own relationship with God.

Well I’m home showered, shaved and feeling a little more human than this morning. The physical change was only temporary, the stickiness washes away easily, the aching legs will settle down and I will recover, in a few days I won’t be quite as tired. The mental impact and dare I say the spiritual impact will be far more lasting.

I have heard a lot about Greenbelt from several friends, all of whom tried to explain what it’s like, but all agreed that they couldn’t explain it fully. For those who haven’t heard about GreenBelt pop over here GreenBelt and check it out, basically they organise an annual festival with a Christian angle with music, talks, art, film, camping, fab food and good times, so although a Christian festival everyone is welcome and I’m sure would enjoy it. But that brief description like my friends explanations falls far, far short of what GreenBelt do and what its like to attend the Festival.

Arriving at 10am on Friday morning we were presented with a sea of cars all waiting to get through the Gates into the camping area, sounds bad but it’s really not, jump out of the car and chat with people around you and the festival begins early, share food, drink, stories and ideas for what we should try to see at the festival., and that really sets the scene, surrounded by friendly people willing to share what they have and enjoy each others company. Then we get directed in by one of the army of volunteers onsite. Once your onsite you head off to the areas you want to go to, early curfew, youth etc. and find a spot to set-up.

The Festival site itself is substantial and at first sight was a little daunting, but the maps provided in the festival plan are very good and once you orientated yourself you knew where you needed to be for each of the events.

The events and activities was the biggest problem of the weekend for me. With so much to do and to see making the decision what to miss out was a hard one. I knew several people I wanted to listen to, bands I wanted to see, acts of worship I wanted to attend and built my weekend around those events.

Here are some of the Highlights of my time at the festival

Maggi Dawn

Musician, Author and theologian among other things, I came across her blog through the GreenBelt website last year and enjoyed her style of writing and the openess she has about the issuses she talks about. I attended a talk on her recent book The Writing on the Wall, which takes portions of scripture and shows how they influence many different aspects of culture including, art, poetry. Maggi explained how she write the book and the challenges she faced and then took us through the idea of the book using the Annunciation(Gabriel visiting Mary to tell of her becoming the Mother of Christ) she spoke of various pieces of art and how peoples theologies and understandings of the Bible influenced what they created. It was a wonderful talk and those who attended enjoyed it thoroughly, my only regret is I didnt have a copy of the book to take to the books signing nor did I have my wallet, Lesson one, take cash just in case.

Ellen and the Escapades

Not a planned viewing as they were asked to fill in at the last minute for Fionn Regan, but i am glad I managed to see them, fantastic performance, with lovely songs and a good stage presence, their cover of Fleetwood Mac’s Go your own Way was beautifully executed and a pleasure to listen too. A band I will certainly be listening to in the future.

Mark Yaconelli

Mark had several talks over the weekend the one I managed to catch was The three desires: Christianity as a spiritual path. Mark was enjoyable to listen to the personal experiences he added to his talk and the way in which he links them to the theme was creative and easy to listen to. The main theme was linked with the prodigal son and the three main characters in the story and the love we have for ourselves and for others.

Communion on Sunday

What an experience, 20,000 people joining together to worship was amazing, then to take communion together, something I value very much, made for a truly fantastic weekend. The Sermon was very meaningful and Maggi Dawns involvement was beautiful, the entire service was inspiring and felt like God was present.

The Herbaliser

Hard to describe really a fusion of Jazz, Hip-Hop, instrumental and Funk, a strange mix which just worked, they certainly got the crowd jumping with noone standing still at the main stage. Fantastic.

Taize

When I saw the programme I was slightly annoyed that the taize service was at the same time as Beverley Knight so I was torn between staying at the main stage and heading over to the Big Top. In the end the Taize at the Big Top won and I am glad it did, whilst I still would have like to see Beverley Knight performing the Taize service was nothing short of inspirational. We arrrived at 9.30 and people were already queing to get in and by the time the doors open the snake was 6 deep. I met some lovely people in the line and got to discuss many things about faith and worship and GreenBelt. By the time worship started the big top was full to capacity and there was a charged atmosphere. The music was beautiful and the entire service was spiritually recharging, and judging by the discussions heading back to the camp sites afterwards everyone enjoyed it thoroughly.

Volunteers

An army of volunteers covering all aspects of festival life all of whom looked to be enjoying what they do, they really do make the festival what it is without them on countless occasions I would have lost my tent, special mention to Elvis for his Golf cart driving abilities and to a lovely young lady studying to be a teacher also on the carts – Thank you.

Falafel

If you took a stroll down the food court no doubt you would have seen the big orange sign advertising falafels, did you try them, if not shame on you, if you did then weren’t they good, mmmmmmm falafels. I’m not sure but I think it was a family running the stall but they certainly knew how to cook some of the best food I had over the entire weekend, I opted for the meze platter which had far to much on to list, just trust me if you didn’t go there then you missed out big time.

This is Just a snippet of what I experienced at GreenBelt not incluiding all the other speakers, acts of worship, meditations, films, comedy and people I encountered. What i have experienced has given me food for thought, ideas for use in my life and my church and lots of memories.

Like my friends I fail to explain fully what it feels like to be there, it is all of the above and so much more, my suggestion is give it a go, keep an eye on the GreenBelt Website as they do have discounts from time to time and family group bookings may be available. It is a worth while visit and family friendly and if you want it there is something for everyone to do or to experience.

If you do decide to go next year maybe I’ll see you there, i’m off to dry out my tent(condensation) then to book next years tickets.